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We make decisions everyday. Things as trivial as what to eat, drink or wear all have to be decided on. Of course the more serious ones like where to go for college, what career to pursue or when to settle down absolutely have to be thought over and eventually have to be resolved. Come to think of it, we have to keep on making decisions every single moment of our lives—unless, of course, we encounter situations or are placed in circumstances that are totally beyond our control. Accidents, for example, belong to that sphere far beyond the reach of any human power. They are unexpected, undesigned and often unfortunate occurrences which involve embarrassment at the least and death at the most. Sickness, too, when they come, especially when you’ve kept away from vices and have lived a generally healthy lifestyle before the diagnosis hit, also belongs to that realm that leaves one bereft of that capacity to make decisions. We hear of individuals who don’t smoke getting lung cancer and transfusion patients contracting infection from AIDS-contaminated blood. It’s completely out of their hands and most of the time, it’s unfair.

Yes, at that precise moment when these mishaps strike, we are left completely helpless and at the mercy of the whims of a very cruel fate. But once the shock has subsided, it is reassuring to know that the power to decide has not completely left us. We can and still have to deal with the aftermath. After all, once placed in such conditions, we have no other choice but to deal with it—and dealing with it usually involves a hefty lot of decision making. For instance, when I got sick, a lot of things had to be decided on: To proceed or not with the treatments, to go home or stay in Manila, to curse the high heavens and blame them about my plight or pray and psyche myself up to beat the cancer. The decisions that my family and I made were not easy ones. They were even quite painful. But what is life without pain anyway? John Patrick in his play The Teahouse of the August Moon wisely puts it thus: “Pain makes man think. Thinking makes man wise. Wisdom makes life endurable.” Every resolution that is of consequence in our lives involves pain as decision-making is by nature a tortuous, agonizing process. However, when we know that we’ve considered all the pros and cons, weighed all there is to reflect on and prayed about it unceasingly, then the decision, no matter how tough, can be made with peace of mind and heart.

It takes courage to make sound judgments. Sometimes, it’s even easier to not accept the reality of the situation, bewail our fate and simply just give up. But the men and women worth their salt make it their choice to be face life head-on. The decision to live a courageous life amid all of life’s battles can be a conscious choice. And how do we do that? Victoria Lincoln in The Arts of Living has an answer that we can ponder on:

“Courage begins when we can admit that there is no life without some pain, some frustration; that there is no tragic accident to which we are immune; and that beyond the normal exercise of prudence we can do nothing about it.

But courage goes on to see that the triumph of life is not in pains avoided, but in joys lived completely in the moment of their happening. Courage lies in never taking so much as a good meal or a day of health and fair weather for granted. It lies in learning to be aware of our moments of happiness as sharply as our moments of pain. We need not be afraid to weep when we have cause to weep, so long as we can really rejoice at every cause for rejoicing.”

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