infiniteperspective.net

I started working when I was in fourth year high school. Part-time, that is. Whatever free time I had from school, I put into my job as a DJ/newscaster in a local radio station or as a student assistant in the then Silliman Medical Center or the Registrar’s Office. It was tough. Taking hold of my time was like juggling three metal balls while maneuvering a monocycle. The comparison might be a little extreme, but I do not exaggerate. I think any working student now can put themselves in my shoes then. A regular day is not complete without the usual sprint from the Registrar’s Office, for example, to the A/S Building and then to the Main Library to take down notes for a paper due the next day. When most other students consider their day complete, mine had just begun at around eight-thirty at night as I drive my trusty old motorcycle to one of the radio stations here to go on board the 9-12 midnight shift. Remember the paper due the following day? Well, I still had to type that as soon as I got home. After college, I rushed on to work as a research assistant before finally flying to Manila to teach.

All those years were busy years. My days were spent thinking about what would happen next. There was always a deadline to beat. Everything that had to be done for the day and if humanly possible, what was assigned to be accomplished tomorrow, must be done today. My mantra then was: Seize the day! It was always a race against me and time. When I got sick, I realized one does not stand a chance of winning against time.

Time is set. We are given 60 seconds for every minute, 60 minutes for every hour, 24 hours in a day, 30 days in a month (on the average) and 12 months in a year. It’s a constant that we have to live with so that no matter how many activities one crams into a particular day, time won’t give up its hands and say: “I can’t do this anymore! You’re schedule is overloading my system.” The hands of the clock will continue to turn—tick-tock-tick-tock. Meanwhile, our fragile bodies get stressed and ache all over before finally succumbing to exhaustion. Medical studies have shown that chronic stress is now one of the causative factors of sickness and disease. In a world that considers “instant” normal, people now live like automatons—somehow forgetting the fact that we are given the eyes to see, the ears to hear and the nose to smell.

I believe that getting sick is God’s way of telling me to enjoy His creation and “behold the wonder” of all that He has made. Now that I have to rest, I’m finally able to take each day as it comes and savor the time spent with family and friends. Whether it be a motorcycle ride to cool Valencia to smell fresh air, a walk in the beach to look at the sunset, or a no holds barred Wow magic sing session of Melissa Manchester’s Looking Through the Eyes of Love (where I always get a 95, by the way), I’m finally learning what it’s like to live. But the best part of getting sick is having all the time in the world to take care of my daughter. Talking to her, hearing her laugh, giving her light massages everyday—these make life worth living. And whether I have 5 minutes, 5 days, 5 months, 5 years or 5 decades, I’m glad that I’m not fighting against time anymore. I’m smelling the roses, finally.

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